


What Three Words are Said Too Much, Yet Not Enough

by IWillBeYourPet



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, And I'm not sorry, Bottom Oswald Cobblepot, But he still takes care of Oswald just fine, Calculating Ed, Ed is surprised Oswalds never been with someone, Ed isn't completely nice, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional Oswald Cobblepot, Feelings, First Time, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, I hinted that Jerome had a thing for Oswald, Idiots in Love, Late Season 4, M/M, One Shot, Oswald and Ed can't help that they are so adorable together, Somewhat denial of feelings, Top Edward Nygma, a little bit of whump, but they do reach an okay for now place, just not in this story, they will get to a happily ever after
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:08:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24581326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IWillBeYourPet/pseuds/IWillBeYourPet
Summary: Set sometimes during late season 4 - around when Ed is robbing banks.Ed is frustrated that he knows he is being used by Lee because he loves her, and since he can't do anything about her he thinks of another way to make himself feel better.After all, Oswald loves him, shouldn't he be able to use him just as easily as Lee did him?Ed's plan isn't nice, but he can't help but care about Oswald, so it gets a little more sappy than he intended.
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma
Comments: 7
Kudos: 92





	What Three Words are Said Too Much, Yet Not Enough

Ed watched Lee leave the room and swallowed hard to get rid of the bitter taste in his mouth. He knew that she was using him but he couldn’t just walk away. Couldn’t stop his feelings for her even knowing what she was doing and he hated it. He was the one meant to be in control, not wrapped around her finger. Not a love sick fool, that had always been Oswald’s territory. 

And actually.

He wanted to feel that in control and he could have it if he wanted it. He was certain he could still make Oswald give in to that weakness, and he needed that. Needed to feel in control of someone, if only to forget how little he had here. 

Ed watched the place just long enough to make sure that Butch wasn’t there before he knocked on the door. There was no answer and he waited for a bit before he knocked on it again, already picking the lock as he waited. A shadow fell over the peephole and he grinned up at him, enjoying the annoyed sound on the other side of the door.

“What do you want?”

“To talk.”

“Go away or-”

“Or what?” The lock gave and he pushed open the door, shoving Oswald back into a stumble and he enjoyed the look of surprise on his face for a moment before the man was going for a weapon. 

He already had his out though and pointed it at him, tsking, “Just came here to talk - put the gun down.” He eyed him and a fond smile pulled at his mouth despite himself, “And the knife I’m sure you have on you.”

“Butch will-”

“Butch isn’t here.” He pressed the door closed behind him and glanced around, “And no minions. Just you. Looks like someone is all alone.”

Predictably hurt flashed across Oswald’s face and the man was so easy. “What do you want?”

“Just to talk. I swear.” He moved closer to him until he could reach out himself and take the gun out of Oswald’s hand and tossed it on the side table before slipping a hand over his waist around to the small of his back.

“What.. what are you doing?” Oswald jerked back, eyes wide, but Ed only waved the knife that he had lifted off him.

“Knew it. Not looking to get stabbed today.”

Oswald was starting to get his bearings and he put his shoulders back, standing up to his full height and snapped out, “Maybe tomorrow then.”

“Maybe.” Very deliberately he set his own gun down on the side table before he moved back in front of him. Oswald’s eyes darted to it and back and the man relaxed the tiniest bit. Ed had to remember not to shake his head, he expected more from the man. Of all the ways they had hurt each other over the years the least of it had been done with weapons. 

Oswald had crossed his arms, glaring up at him. How had the man lasted this long. No matter how many times he claimed he was cold and ruthless, Oswald wore his vulnerability on his sleeve. On his face. So emotional, so  _ weak. _

And Ed realized he could be talking to himself but that was why he was here. To prove that he was in control. Without warning he surged forward and grabbed Oswald by his shirt, shoving him hard up against the nearest wall and tilted his head down to kiss him. 

Even though they had never done this, they fit together perfectly, and Ed always knew that they would. Oswald’s sound of surprise was lost in the kiss, and when the man reached up to push him away he grabbed both of his wrists and slammed them against the wall on either side of his head, leaning more into the kiss. 

He finally pulled away because Oswald wasn’t kissing back, and he wanted to see his face. Doubt was trickling in but he knew he wasn’t wrong about this. As soon as he could talk Oswald sputtered out, “What do you think you’re  _ doing _ ?”

“Kissing you, obviously.” His eyes scanned Oswald’s face and the man was confused, angry but also  _ there it was _ . A small bit of hope in the man’s eyes, a hope that he was sure the man wished he could crush down, could deny existed. He knew the feeling. More confident that he was right he leaned back in, fitting his body against Oswald’s, sliding a thigh between the man’s legs and dropped one of his hands to cup the side of his face, stroking across his cheek softly with his thumb. 

Oswald had no chance against it. He leaned down and kissed his again, could feel Oswald tilt his chin up to meet it and he had him. Just that easy. The hand he had dropped reached up to grab at Ed’s shirt, holding on, and Oswald was kissing him back. Inexperienced and clumsy but so so eager and the twist in his gut from when Lee screwed with his head eased. Because this was his Oswald, would always be his, no matter what he did to the man.

It was a heady sense of power. He pulled back and rested his forehead against Oswald’s, catching his breath. He shifted his weight and chuckled when he realized Oswald was already hard against him, just from a few kisses, dropping the man’s other wrist to cup his face with both hands, forcing his eyes up until they met. 

“What do you want from me?” Oswald’s voice wobbled, and he swiped at his eyes, trying to hold his glare even as his eyes teared up again.

“It’s something you have for me that I want, Oswald.” He couldn’t help himself as he lowered his voice, “I can’t be bought, but I can be stolen with a glance, I’m worthless-”

“Stop.” Oswald dropped his hands to Ed’s chest and tried to push him back. “Stop.”

“I hate being interrupted.” He grabbed Oswald’s wrists again and pressed them to the wall on either side of him, leaving them still pressed against each other. He wasn’t the strongest person in Gotham but he was bigger than Oswald and after a moment of struggling against him Oswald gave up, going silent as he glared at him. “Thank you. I can’t be bought, but I can be stolen with a glance. I’m worthless to one, but priceless to two. What am I?”

“Ed-”

“I know you know the answer Oswald.” He leaned down to kiss him again and Oswald jerked his head back but there was nowhere to go except to slam it against the wall. He caught his eyes and gave him a genuine smile, “You still love me.”

Oswald’s eyes darted across his face, trying to read him, trying to understand what was happening. “You’re trying to hurt me.” He sniffled, a few tears sliding down his cheeks. “Please don’t Ed,” his voice broke, “Please not like this.”

“I’m not trying to hurt you.” He didn’t have to pretend, the words were genuine. This wasn’t about hurting Oswald, it was about controlling him. 

“I’m not stupid Ed, I-”

He kissed him again, as soon as his lips were on Oswald the man let out a helpless sound, kissing him back. Oswald wanted him more than he wanted to protect himself. He kept the kiss short and pulled back, swiping the tear on Oswald’s cheek away with his thumb. “I’m not trying to hurt you Oswald, I swear it.”

“Then what?”

He thought about his words, he didn’t want to lie. He didn’t want this under false pretenses, he wanted no doubt that this control was real. “I’m curious.” Oswald tensed and he closed his eyes for a moment before he opened them and chose his words differently, “I want to know Oswald. At least once.”

“Know what?”

The words were snapped out but Oswald was leaning in towards him, desperation peeking through, and Oswald probably would believe anything he told him. “What could have been, Oswald.” He slid a thumb over the man’s lips, “Just once.”

“You don’t love me.”

“I care about you, Oswald.” And that was the truth. “Isn’t that enough?”

Hurt flashed on his face, but he must have realized it was the closest he would get because his eyes dropped to Ed’s shoulder and he nodded. He felt the smile that curled his lips and knew that it wasn’t nice. He slid one hand down Oswald’s chest, making the man suck in a quick breath. 

He watched his hand slide down to the top of Oswald’s pants, hovering just over where the fabric was tented and looked up. Oswald’s eyes were screwed shut, his face flushed, jaw clenched as he tried not to make any noise. 

“Look at me.” Oswald shook his head. He only tilted his head though, and kept his voice soft, “Oswald, look at me.” 

Finally he opened his eyes, and if Ed was being honest with he was half hard just from that look. It was needy and desperate and  _ fearful. _ Oswald knew that Ed was going to hurt him, he could see it, but the man was going to let him. Because he  _ loved _ him.

“Do you still love me, Oswald?”

His mouth opened and closed, licking his lips and Ed watched the conflict on his face. Finally even though it looked like it hurt Oswald took a deep breath and huffed it out, “Yes.”

It could be enough, he had his proof that he could own someone in this way, that he could use him. That no matter what happened between them Oswald would always give in to him but he wanted more.

He slid his hand over Oswald’s pants and at just the small touch his hips jerked, breath catching. “You want me.”

The hesitation was shorter this time, voice resigned. “Yes.”

“Okay.” He pressed his hand firmer, cupping him, “If you tell me to stop I will.” He leaned in and hovered just above his lips, “I won’t hurt you Oswald.” He leaned the rest of the way and kissed him, a bit rougher as he slid his tongue into the other’s mouth, nipped at his lip, until Oswald moaned, clinging to him. 

When he pulled back he slid a hand to his hair and tilted the man’s head to the side, baring his throat. He pressed a few kisses along his neck before sucking on it, nipping once or twice to listen to Oswald whimper. He wanted to mark him up a little, so for days the man would remember this. It made him giddy to think about Oswald having to explain it to anyone that saw.

Oswald rocked his hips against him, rutting against his leg like he couldn’t help it. And he knew what he wanted. He spoke close against his throat, “I want to fuck you.”

Oswald’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he scrambled to tilt Ed’s head up, trying to meet his eyes. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“Ed… I don’t know…” Uncertainty filled Oswald’s face, and Ed could feel him pulling away. It made him angry, the man shouldn’t deny him anything. He slammed him harder against the wall, making him yelp.

“You think you’re too good for me Oswald? You have to know I’m not going to let you fuck  _ me _ .” Oswald was shaking his head, eyes wide as he was clearly trying to come up with the words.

He pulled back just enough to spin Oswald around so he was face first against the wall and pressed himself to his back. “I want this Oswald. I want you to do this  _ for me _ .”

“Ed-”

“Or do you still not understand sacrifice for love?”

Oswald’s body tensed up but he wasn’t fighting him, wasn’t trying to get out of his grasp and he mumbled out, “That isn’t it Ed…”

“Then _ what _ Oswald.” He slid arms around his waist, fingers ghosting over the button on his pants. “Tell me to stop and I will.” Oswald was shaking his head, but he didn’t say to stop. Ed undid the button on his pants and didn’t waste time pushing them down over Oswald’s hips.

“Ed-” His voice wobbled dangerously, some of that instability slipping into it, some of the danger. 

Ed responded to it, kicking Oswald’s feet slightly more apart, as much as they could with his pants around his thighs, and pressed a hand to the middle of his back so he leaned against the wall, responding to the threat with his own authority. “Hmm?” He palmed Oswald’s ass, and momentarily he forgot what his plan was because he had thought about this before. He didn’t like men, not really, but he’d always felt  _ something  _ for this other man.

He hadn’t planned on actually having sex with him but he had come prepared just in case. He rummaged in his pocket for the lube he had brought, sliding his hand around to skim across Oswald’s stomach until he slid down to stroke his cock just once. Oswald’s breath hitched, a sob, and he pulled his hand away to palm his ass again. 

“I’m glad it’s you.”

“What?” That hyper focus on a project was already engaged and he had the tube in his hand. Was already thinking about the next time that him and Oswald were at odds he would be able to taunt that this had happened. 

“I was only hesitant because… I’ve never… but I’m glad it’s you.”

Oswald sounded so soft, so broken and that made it through. “Glad it’s me what?”

“My first.”

Ed felt like his whole body seized up. “Oswald.” He could only stare at him, all his genius and it was like he just couldn’t think for a moment. He dropped the tube back into his pocket, and pulled both hands back, taking a step away.

He realized the underlying noise that filled the room was Oswald crying, face buried against his arm. After long moments of not touching him Oswald lifted his head, tilting it like he was trying to see where he went. “Ed?”

His voice stuck in his throat though, trying to wrap his mind around what he had said. His first?  _ His first _ . “Oswald… I… I need to go.”

Oswald pushed off the wall at that as he turned to face him, scrambling to pull his pants back up, face covered in tear streaks, “Ed?” He sounded so confused, so hurt. “I thought…”

When he visited Oswald in Arkham, given his state and the way Jerome looked at Oswald he was  _ sure _ there had been something there. Or maybe even with Jim Gordon, he saw the way Oswald looked at  _ him _ . There had to be someone, anyone.

“You’ve never been with a man?”

Oswald wouldn’t meet his eyes, still holding his pants up, face flushed. “I’ve not been with anyone.” The words were defensive, eyes darting up to meet Ed’s before they skirted away. When Ed still did nothing the soft look on Oswald’s face abruptly went away, replaced with hurt and anger, like he had just realized something.

He scrambled to do up his pants, rubbing one arm across his face, “This was just to… to humiliate me?” His voice broke, high pitched and shrill, like it did when he was  _ really _ upset. When he was really hurt. “I’ll kill… I’ll kill you.” He wasn’t moving away from the wall though and Ed sighed as he looked him up and down.

Despite everything that had happened between them Oswald was his friend and he cared deeply about him. As much as anyone like him could. And this, no one deserved their first time to be like this. He moved closer to him and Oswald’s hand twitched like he was going to go for the knife he didn’t have. “Oswald.” He tipped his head down so he could see his eyes, “I’m not trying to humiliate you.”

“I was gonna let you, you made me tell you I love you. Just so you could… leave? Could hold it over me?”

“No.” He finally moved so they were touching again and grabbed Oswald’s wrists when he started to lift them, he didn’t really want to get punched in the face. “I didn’t know you’d never been with anyone, Oswald.”

“So  _ what _ ?” Some of the anger had faded in the face of embarrassment, humiliation. He choked on tears, “Now who isn’t good enough, huh?”

“Oh, Ozzie.” Abruptly he pulled him forward into a hug, holding him tight and after only a moment Oswalds arms wrapped around him, holding on for dear life. It was easier to say when he couldn’t see Oswald, when he didn’t have to meet his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you. Doing it like this, this will hurt you.”

He wasn’t sure how long he held him, Oswald’s face pressed against his chest. One of his hands was on the back of the man’s head, petting him, and he didn’t exactly remember doing it. Maybe it was Ed’s influence, but he knew it wasn’t just that. He remembered the way Oswald looked at him when he showed up at Arkham. Looked at  _ him _ , not Ed. He’d been so happy to see him, Oswald had always seen him. 

Finally he pulled back though, and could feel that Oswald was reluctant to let him go. Well, this hadn’t gone quite as he hoped. “I think I should go.”

Oswald grabbed on to him though, pulling him down by a hold on his shirt to kiss him again. He tasted salty from the tears, with a neediness that was intoxicating. Ed kissed him back, wrapping an arm around his waist to pull him closer, unable to help himself. 

Oswald pulled back to drop his head to his shoulder, “Please don’t go.”

“I have to. I got work to do.”

Oswald nodded but tightened his grip, “Please Ed. I can’t handle to have been this close. Please. If you really cared about me-”

“I do care about you. Don’t attempt to manipulate me.”

“I’m sorry. You’re right.” Oswald was pulling his defenses back together, pushing back away from Ed as he crossed his arms and stared at the floor. And he didn’t want to see him go back into his shell quite yet, wanted more glimpses of that softness. 

He glanced at his watch, he should be back soon, Lee was going to be looking for him. Because he was sure she needed something from him. But Oswald needed him too, for very different reasons. And he made his decision. “Okay, Oswald, but not here, not against the wall like that.” 

There was a flash of excitement on Oswald’s face, and anxiety, but Ed was already kissing him. He didn’t have to look where they were going as he backed the man up, a scan of the room and he remembered the layout. When the back of Oswald’s knees hit the couch he let the man fall backwards. “Scoot back.”

He was slow to move, favoring his bad leg, and Edward made a note to be careful of it. He settled on his knees between the man’s legs, looking down at him. Oswald’s face was guarded, wary, as he scanned over Ed’s. His trust had been shaken and Ed settled down on top of him, kissing along his jaw until he reached his ear. “Relax, I got you.”

This seemed like it was a bad idea but the calculating part reminded him that this would only tie Oswald to him more, make the man more compliant in the future even as the genius part of him said it would make the man more likely to kill him to sever that tie. Or not. It was always a toss up in Gotham.

Oswald’s hands were hovering near him, but not touching, and his poor penguin was so out of his element. He did take a moment to look around, “Butch isn’t expected back anytime soon, is he?” Oswald’s only response was a shrug as he pressed against Ed, trying to get closer. 

Well, he’d deal with that particular awkward problem if it came to it. Instead he turned his attention back to Oswald, “On your stomach.”

Oswald’s mouth quirked at that, he clearly didn’t like it but he did as he was told and there was that thrill of power again that went straight to Ed’s cock. He had never tried to bend Oswald to his will before, he had no idea how effective it would be. He could have done so much more damage to the man before the first time he tried to kill him. Could have made him crawl. 

He loved the balance of affection and cruelty with the man and he hummed as he reached to pull his pants down again, sliding them down his thighs and he gently prodded the man up to his knees. “So good, Ozzie.” The words slipped out without meaning to, but he didn’t have to see Oswald’s reaction to know what the words would do to him. It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad.

He pulled the lube back out, rucking up Oswald’s shirt until he could run a hand down his naked back. The man’s knees spread on their own and Ed grinned. He slid one finger across Oswald’s hole, palming himself over his pants with his other hand. Oswald whined, and Ed shook his head, “How do you trust me this much?”

“I don’t.” Oswald didn’t even need to think about the answer and that gave Ed pause.

He kept his hands on him but leaned close, “What can I do to make you trust me right now, trust me with this.” Even as he asked it he knew the answer was nothing. There was nothing he could do or say, because there would always be something that would make them hurt each other. 

“Please.”

He didn’t answer with words, respected that Oswald didn’t try to pretend like anything could make them trust each other completely, and instead pressed one finger against him, sliding into him. 

Oswald made a small sound and his body moved away but Ed slid an arm around his waist to hold him there. “Just relax.” He’d never done this with anyone but he’d touched himself and he was a freaking genius, so he knew what to do.

He moved slowly until he had two fingers in him, sliding in and out, and pulled them out settling better between his legs, reaching for his own pants, getting them out of the way just enough to pull himself out. 

“Ed?”

“It’s okay, you ready?”

This still wasn’t the way it should be. There should be foreplay and sweet words and- Ed shook his head hard, those were Ed thoughts, not his. They had to be. He already went out of his way to take care of Oswald, there was no reason to go crazy with it.

He shuffled forward on his knees, wrapping a hand around Oswald’s hip as he lined himself up and pushed in. He moved slow, listening to Oswald’s small sounds of discomfort, maybe pain. Oswald never asked him to stop, to slow down, so he kept moving until he was pressed flush against him.

The man was so tight around him, so hot, that he had to take a moment to catch his own breath. He wrapped arms around him, pulling Oswald against him as nuzzled the side of his neck. Oswald was whimpering, body shaking and Ed placed an affectionate kiss on his jaw. No one had ever come so undone for him before. 

Oswald had his head tucked against his arms, hiding his face, but whimpered out, “I love you.”

“I know.” He sighed against Oswald’s neck and he could say the words back, but he wouldn’t mean them and he couldn’t be that cruel. Instead he started to move slowly, shifting Oswald when there was a hiss of pain so his weight wasn’t on his bad leg, pulling Oswald’s torso up so they could stay in close contact. 

His own orgasm was coming quickly, which surprised him, but having sex with Oswald was so much more than he had ever thought it would be. And there was a pang in his chest at the thought of this being a one time thing. 

To distract himself from that thought he slid one hand around to touch Oswald’s cock. It was pressed up against his stomach, dripping precum and Oswald let out an undignified howl when Ed touched him. He stroked him and Oswald was talking, some string of gibberish but he got the general gist of it. Don’t stop. 

No worries there. 

Oswald was scrambling to hold on to the arm across his chest, fingers digging in hard enough to leave bruises and it was only a few more strokes before the man was cumming, crying out, gasping for breath as his body tightened around Ed. He stroked him a few time through it before he grabbed his hips to chase his own orgasm. He followed quickly, grinding into his ass to cum deep inside him and he probably should have asked if that was okay but he was pretty sure that right now Oswald would tell him anything was okay. 

He pulled out carefully and nudged Oswald to roll over, the man compliant. Once Oswald was looking at him he cradled his face between his hands and kissed him. All the feelings, all the thoughts that he couldn’t say, would never say. He wasn’t Oswald, he couldn’t let himself be that vulnerable. But the things he wished he could say, he put those into the kiss. 

When he pulled back Oswald still looked a little shocky, sitting there with his pants still down, covered in both their cum, lips swollen. The man looked wrecked. It made Ed smile, though that made Oswald snap out of it. Ed tucked himself away as Oswald tried to get his pants back on, though he had caught Oswald sneak a glance at him before he did and when Oswald’s eyes met his he was blushing. 

He was barely clothed when there was a voice from the doorway, “What the hell is going on here?”

Ed looked over his shoulder at Butch in the doorway, and back to Oswald, and his grin only got bigger as Oswald stared in shock, hiis mouth working, but no words came out. He thought about leaving him to it but he looked like he was going to blow a gasket, so overwhelmed. So instead he leaned forward to give him a chaste kiss on the lips, mostly to distract him, and then pushed to his feet. 

“Just a friendly visit, Butch, to a couple of my good friends.”

Butch looked at him, and then over his shoulder at Oswald, “Looks like it.”

He moved so he was blocking Butch’s view of Oswald as best he could while the man pulled himself together, he could at least give him that. Finally Oswald was on his feet next to him, though a glance said that it was very obvious what had been happening. Butch and Oswald’s eyes met and held for long seconds before Butch smirked. It was a soft one though, and how Oswald brought that out in everyone he had no idea.

“Right. I’m just gonna go put away some groceries.”

No more smart comments, no shots at him, the man just headed further into the house leaving the two of them. He expected to get yelled at, for Oswald to take out his embarrassment at getting caught on him but the man just awkwardly stood in front of him, eyes darting up before going back to the floor. 

“I got to go.”

“I… I can walk you out.”

At the door Oswald moved forward like he was going to touch him, to hug him, but unease crossed his face and he settled back. “Goodbye Ed.”

He grabbed him to pull into a hug, holding him for long seconds before he spoke. “I’m glad I was your first too, Ozzie.”

When he stepped back Oswald’s face was red and the struggle to give in or put up his defenses was so obvious. The man stumbled over his words, “If you tell anyone… If you…”

He trailed off, clearly not sure what he wanted to threaten. Ed grinned at him, reaching up to put a finger over his mouth to stop him from talking. “I hope we can do it again, sometime.” And he really did. He turned and walked away without waiting for an answer, without giving the man a chance to recover from the shock of it and talk him out of leaving.

Being with Oswald felt like some strange fucked of version of being home, but right now wasn’t the time. He had Lee, he had other plans, but the two of them always managed to find their ways back into each other’s lives. There would be another chance, he was sure of it. 

  
  



End file.
